• Nathira Salim

Test Results - Part 3

Welcome back to my blog peeps. Hope you guys are all doing well and good.

If you are reading my blog, you must be aware of the current silent drama happening at the moment - my mammo results. I think I am more afraid of the mammo than the actual cancer itself. Like I mentioned in my previous post here I spotted a lump or lumps in my scan and I also predicted what the next actions will be. I predicted that I will receive a call to come for a biopsy before my consultation date with my doctor. That didn’t happen - but my predictions about going for a biopsy came true.

Its a case of good and not so good news. Good news is that it's not cancer. Not so good news is that they have observed some ”bizzare coarse calcifications” in the right boob and “coarse calcifications noted bilaterally”.

In layman term - something news brewing inside and the doctors have no idea what it is unless they do a mammogram assisted biopsy. Alternative number 1 - proceed with surgery without going through biopsy - but will still to pinpoint exactly where to open using the mammogram machine. Alternative number 2 - wait for another 6 months and monitor.

I chose the latter. If mammorgram was hard let's say the pain scale out of 10 where 10 is unbearable, feel exhausted and excruciating pain - the last mammo I did was at 8/10, the mammogram assisted biopsy is 10/10 and pinpointing the spots before surgery - thats 20/10. The pain hits the roof. I don’t enjoy hugging the goddamned cold huge machine with all my life, breathless and being unable to speak while I am shedding tears at the same time. No. I will wait.

The doctor understood, but she did advise me to call for a biopsy if I ever change my mind. I then asked the doc if I could instead proceed to do a mastectomy ( complete removal of breasts) - doctor didn't seem to expect this and hubby immediately held my shoulders. Doc told me not to over react to this and asked me to wait for another six months before we can decide what to do. And I was like - no. Let's remove them. I don‘t want to go through the waiting to know if the cancer will come back. But the doc again advised me to wait and hubby was speaking softly to me in Tamil to talk about it later.

So - to summarise - I have to wait. For another six months.

I am taking what I get - the news is good - I am still ok. I am ok for the next six months. There are some more calcifications here and there- it could be because of the surgery and its common for the fats to move around post surgery which was exactly what my sister advised too. It could also be that my hormones are back which would explain the boob pain I am getting. Goodness this ‘could be’s are killing me.

Am I over reacting? What do you think?

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