Confused me

Ever had this feeling that when you want to talk to your friends - the ones you have not talked to for months - and when you call them, they become busy?

Ever since I was young, I have this feeling, that if I call up my friends, I will be disturbing them from whatever world saving mission they might be on. Cos whenever I call them, they happen to be real busy and will tell me that they will call me back. They eventually do, but still I will feel bad. So I don’t call them. I m never that busy - and I have always made time for anyone who did call me - so I stopped calling people. Once in a while we SMS and maybe once in a while we gather at their cribs. That’s all I socialize.

I don’t drink, and I don’t party. I guess I may have passed that stage where I can stay up late and party all night long - cos I really dun think I m suitable for that kind of environment. Maybe its because my husband does not approve, or maybe I m not right for those environment.

Well either ways, we have made a point here - I m not busy and I don’t party.

I have an issue. I have been toying with the idea of taking up Psychology as a degree again. But I m not sure if I am doing the right thing. So I thought of calling up my friend, Rajen. Someone at the end of the other line said that the person I m trying to call was busy and should try again later. I didn’t try again. So I left a message for Ras asking him to call me. I still don’t see any phone calls from him.

I will call him later again tomorrow - cos I forgot to bring my phone to work with me today.

So should I study Psychology or dun study at all? I was thinking of taking up History or political sciences in NUS – but then I gave myself a huge slap to jolt myself awake. Hello!?? We are talking about upgrading me with a degree that I am eligible for - not something that I need to arm myself with excellent grades of A levels!!!! I love History and I have an interest in PS - but I don’t have the grades to do what I like.

So I settle for the next best. Psychology. Do I want to take up this course, or I am thinking of this course because I don’t find anything I like to do? I could have taken up the Microsoft Certified Solution Developer course or all the other MS Development course and get myself the programmer job… but if I land the programmer seat - I will not be able to spend time with Raihaan and TA. I don’t want that. I don’t want to go to Hamburg or anywhere my company is thinking of sending me because I don’t want to be away from Raihaan.

I cannot afford to be a housewife as well (the truth is, I will go mad if I m at home with just Raihaan alone!). I have to discuss in depth with TA about this.

Well anyway just another day more to go for the year 2008 to end.

This has been a good and blessed year for me. I wish, hope and pray to God that the next coming year will be good and fruitful as this and hopefully I will gain knowledge as well.
Let me see if I m able to blog anything on the last day of the year itself.

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